Since October is National Bullying Prevention Month; it has
caused me to reflect on my tween/teen years. I've always felt fortunate that I
had the ability to be in one place for all if my schooling. I have friends that
I have literally known since I was 4 years old. I have no doubt that I was
bullied as well as being a bully myself. In fact I worry so much about the
latter that I have a hard time believing the goodness of my children. {Because I
perceive that I was so bad and they are a part of me how are they so good?}
They really are nice kids though and that’s not just me talking, that’s others…but
I digress.
Anyway so here are a few ideas I wish I either knew or accepted
while in my adolescence…
Pay
attention in all math classes...I know as I sat there I
kept thinking "but when will I really use this?" The real world
application comes when you have to help your child (or someone else’s) with
their homework. That's how teachers should answer too - more people may pay
attention…or not, it would have a least been an answer which would be more than
what was said to me when I actually vocalized it.
Let it go - for all
the times your boyfriend may be stolen or leaves you - let it go. To borrow a
line from "Sixteen Candles" "That's why they call them
crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else." Let it go -
there's something better out there. You just can't see it yet.
Move on - for all
those times you think your friend stabbed you in the back - learn from it, but move
on. You may not have all the information to make an informed decision. Or
they didn’t have all the information to make an informed decision. Either way –
move on. Remember to only say something behind someone else’s back you would
say to their face.
Don't be in
a hurry/Slow down - I loved my dad. He had this
philosophy that he didn't want me to work while I was in high school & when
asked about it he told me "you will have your whole life to work". As
I reflect on just how right he was I hope I can give this freedom to my kids.
Always have
your picture taken – OK this sounds a bit odd and I don’t particularly like my
photo taken, but follow me here, I think you’ll get it. In my first life
(1989-2002) I was a travel agent. Back in the days when you could go for a very
small price. My first trip was to London. To be more specific, 48 hours in
London & Bath. I found my pictures recently. Lots of scenery &
buildings – not one of me. Only because I’m an honest person do you know I was
actually there – if I had been in at least one of them you would have no doubt.
Basically I’m saying you need to have your photo taken as proof you were there.
Just saying…
Now none of these
revelations are earth shattering. They probably won’t change the world, but they
seemed thought provoking to me. I do hope I can steer my children through their
rough years with fewer tears and torment than I had.
I hope I can give them a positive self-image and the desire to do good to
everyone.